Love them or hate them, it’s hard to deny the ubiquity of dating apps. Gone (or at least less popular) are the days of being set up on blind dates or exchanging numbers with an attractive stranger at a bar. If you’re going to try to meet the love of your life on Bumble, Hinge, Tinder, etc., you might as well make sure your profile is in tip-top shape. That means avoiding some of the phrases and details below. Good luck out there.
1. What You’re *Not* Looking For
Including criteria for who shouldn’t swipe left or message you is just a real Debbie Downer move. Rather than focusing on what you’re not looking for, be specific about what you are looking for. Chances are, if you’re clear enough about the type of person you are (your passions, jobs, favorite movie, etc.), prospective partners will weed themselves out.
2. Anything Too Generic
Now, we’re not saying you need to write a dissertation on what you’re looking for in a partner with Zadie Smith-level descriptions, but ultra-generic statements like “I love music,” are just plain boring. Instead, add a detail or two: Have you seen Cher in concert seven times? Were you in a punk band in college? Adding these littledetailsmakes it a lot easier for someone to start a conversation with you.
3. Sarcasm About Being on ‘The Apps’
Can dating app jokes be funny? They sure can, but as much as we love to poke fun at the objectively strange way we meet people these days, being too negative about the experience can be a turn-off. If you feel like you’re too cool to be online dating, don’t do it. Statements like, “Only on here because my friend signed me up,” or “I’m 5’8 (because apparently that matters on here [eyeroll emoji]” make it seem like you’re totally disinterested in meeting someone.
4. Lies (or Even Exaggerations)
Imagine this: You match with the guy of your dreams. Like, he’s perfect on paper. You set up a drinks date and one of the first things he asks you about is your college crew career. Turns out, he rowed at Princeton and your harmless little fib (you were a benchwarmer on your high school crew team) is exposed right off the bat. Awkward. Rather than lying—or even exaggerating—and risking being caught red-handed, be honest. In our experience, not many strong relationships are built off of untruths.
5. *No Information*
No, a blank profile isn’t mysterious. It just looks like you’re lazy and don’t care enough to add at least something about yourself. If you’re not comfortable sharing many personal details, at least include a question or two that could start a conversation with a match. Trust: It’s better than nothing.
