Thank you for returning for the discussion on criteria #2 in the series on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Over the coming weeks, I will individually discuss one of the 9 diagnostic criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder that is found in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition, or DSM-5. Fully understanding each of the criteria needed to meet a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder will help you better understand the disorder, or at least traits of the disorder. Check out the last blog, Criteria For NPD: What Is a Grandiose Sense Of Self for more information on Criteria #1.
Today I will discuss the second criteria in the DSM-5 for Narcissistic Personality Disorder, “is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.”
For someone with narcissism, they fantasize about having unlimited power, success, beauty, and love. They see things in extremes. Everything is over the top and they deserve the best of everything. By having unlimited success, power, brilliance, or love, they can maintain the belief they are superior to others. These fantasies also allow them to explain their successes to others in the context of others being inferior.
Reality doesn’t support their beliefs about themselves so they must live in a world of fantasy that is created and maintained by them. The fantasies they live in helps protect them from actually seeing themselves for what they are, which is someone who has low self-esteem and emptiness. Because they live in a fantasy world, information that is presented as contrary to their beliefs is ignored and dismissed. If they suspect someone might be trying to expose them for who they are, and destroying the fantasy world they have created, they will become defensive and enter into a narcissistic rage.
With their defensiveness and rage they can keep people at a distance, which protects their fantasy and allows them to continue to live in their fantasy world.
By creating these fantasies, they can support their feelings of grandiosity and that they deserve more than everyone else because they are superior to others. The fantasy is the lie they tell themselves about who they want to be seen as and allows them to hide who they truly are.
For a narcissist, this is seen as them associating with people that they think have reached success as they would like. By associating with these people, it helps others believe the fantasy they are spinning. However, if you look closely, they don’t contribute in the same way as those who are actually successful and powerful. The narcissist can talk a big game though and this allows them to be kept in this circle.
In their effort to be on top and maintain their fantasy, they will step all over whoever gets in the way. They want no one and nothing to keep them from achieving their perceived goals and this means that they don’t consider others. The narcissist has an inflated ego that is not matched with what is happening around them.
As long as they can remain preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, and love then they can believe it is true. Combine that with a lack of empathy or concern for how others might think or feel, and you have a person who looks out only for themselves and no one else. Others are used solely to help them remain in their fantasy world.
At Mindset Therapy we provide mental health services in Texas and Washington from trained professionals, via telepsychology, which allows you to attend the appointment from the location most convenient for you. Visit Mindset Therapy at https://www.mindsettherapyonline.com/ to learn more about the services offered and make an appointment. Also visit our YouTube page, Mindset Therapy, PLLC, for the Mental Health Minute series that provides quick pieces of information for common mental health issues.
