Running Away: You're Not Alone (2024)

Questions to ask yourself before running away

  • Will I be safe?
  • Where will I go?
  • Who will help if I get in trouble?
  • How will I get by?

If you have already run away or if you have been kicked out of your home, we want you to know your rights as a runaway in Maine.

Can I be arrested?

  • NO. You cannot be arrested, fingerprinted or put in jail for running away from home if you live in Maine. Every state is different.
  • The police can take you into what is called “interim care” for up to 6 hours. This is NOT an arrest. The police officer will decide if they will take you into “interim care.” They do not have to.
  • If you are in a safe place, like a friend's house and your friend's parents agree you can stay there, the officer may let you stay there while you make a plan for your future.
  • If the officer thinks you are not safe and takes you into “interim care,” they must call your parent or guardian and DHHS. The police can ask your parents to take you home only if you and your parents agree to you going home. If you do not agree, the police must take you to where DHHS says you should go.
  • Sometimes the police will bring you home even though you told them you do not agree. If that happens, call Kids Legal (866) 624-7787.

What happens if DHHS is called?

  • It depends on why you have left your home. A DHHS worker may come out and meet with you. They may call your parents. They may do nothing. They may offer you short-term emergency services.
  • If the DHHS worker thinks you will get hurt if you go home, they may try to get a court order. The court order would put you in DHHS custody. This means DHHS would make decisions for you and decide where you should live. Your parents would not have the right to make decisions for you while you are in DHHS custody.
  • If you are in DHHS custody, DHHS needs to develop a plan to help you and your family work things out so you can go back home and be safe, or make a permanent safety plan for you outside of your parents' home.

Can an adult I am staying with be arrested?

  • In Maine, there is no crime of "harboring a minor."
  • If an adult is letting you stay with them so you are not on the streets AND you can leave their home at any time (they are not keeping you there), then no law is broken. The adult should not be arrested.
  • Every state is different. So, do not cross state lines. The adult and/or you can get in trouble if you leave Maine.

Are there places I can go for help?

YES, there are shelters, "drop-in" centers, and homeless youth outreach programs:

If I am at a shelter, does the shelter have to tell my parents I am there?

  • That depends. A shelter is there to try to keep you safe
  • Normally, a shelter must try to contact your parents within 3 hours of when you show up to spend the night. If your parents cannot be reached, the shelter will send a letter to them the next day. The shelter will call DHHS if they cannot find your parents.
  • The shelter will not call your parents if you believe your parents may hurt you. They will make a referral to DHHS instead. If you do not want your parents to know where you are, you can ask that your parents not be told. You must ask for this in writing. You can only make this request the first three nights you are at the shelter. After that, the shelter can call your parents. Work with shelter staff to make a safety plan for your future.

Can I get my stuff from home?

  • That depends. Even though you use things at home, like your furniture, computer, tv, and phone, they may not be yours. Most things are probably not yours.
  • If your parents bought the property you use and it was not a gift to you, then the property belongs to your parents. You do not have a right to take it.
  • Anything that you bought, even if it was from allowance or gift money, is yours. Anything that was a gift to you, like a tv for your birthday, is yours. You have the right to take your property.
  • If your parents will not let you take it, you can contact the police to report it as stolen or have an adult file a small claims case on your behalf for the return of your property.

Can I get medical care without my parents?

YES. You can get treatment for:

  • Emergencies
  • Family Planning
  • Sexually Transmitted Diseases
  • Substance Abuse
  • Mental Health

Also, if you have not been getting any support from your parents for the last 60 days, you can be treated for any condition without your parent's permission. The medical provider you go to will decide if they will treat you. If you get treatment, your parents cannot be notified. If your parents try to find out why you went for treatment, the doctor cannot tell them unless you sign a release form. You are responsible for paying for the appointment unless you have MaineCare or health insurance that will pay for it. There are homeless health clinics you can go to as well.

Can I get MaineCare (health coverage) and Food Stamps?

YES. If you do not live with your parents, you can apply for MaineCare and for Food Stamps. Go to the local DHHS office. You can also go to your local food pantry and/or soup kitchen.

What if I am being abused at home?

There are a few things you can do.

  • If you are afraid for your safety, you can file a Complaint for Protection From Abuse against the person who is abusing you, even if it is your parent.
    • If you are under 18 or are not legally emancipated, an adult who is a "person responsible" for you must bring the court case on your behalf. A person responsible for you is an adult who is responsible for your health or welfare. It does not have to be your parent or legal guardian. A DHHS worker can also bring a case on your behalf even if you are not in DHHS custody. If you are unaccompanied and do not have anyone over 18 to file the court papers on your behalf, contact Kids Legal for assistance.
    • If you are over 18 or you are legally emancipated, you can bring the case on your own.
    • You can get the forms at the local District Court or online. You may want to go to your local domestic violence project or sexual assault support agency for help.
  • You can contact DHHS Child Protective. If DHHS won’t help you, you can talk to 3 adults.
    • Those 3 adults can file a "3 person petition" in District Court. The petition would ask that the Court order DHHS to take custody of you and find a safe place for you to live and give services to you and your family.
  • If you are 16 or older and have a plan of how to take care of yourself, you can file for emancipation in the Maine District Court. The Court will find a lawyer to represent you. More on Emancipation.
  • If you do not want to get emancipated, or if you are under 16 years old, an adult can file a petition to be your legal guardian. This means they act as your parent. The adult has to file a Petition for Guardianship in the county Probate Court where you are staying. More on Guardianship of a Minor.

Can I go to school?

  • Some runaway students are considered "homeless students."
  • You are a homeless student when you do not have an "adequate, fixed, regular nighttime residence." This means if you are living in a shelter, motel, campground, car, the streets, or if you are couch surfing with friends or family.In that case, you should be able to stay in the school you were attending before you ran away or became homeless for the rest of the school year, or the school in the area where you are now staying.
  • The school must provide transportation to your former school or new school for the rest of the school year. The school must let you in the day you call them and/or show up even if you don't have all the documents you need. If the school makes you wait, call Kids Legal.
  • If you are not a homeless student, but there are emergency reasons for why you are not living at home, the superintendent of the school where you are staying can let you enroll there. If you have a problem going to school, call Kids Legal. More on Rights of Homeless Students

Where can I call for support?

  • National Runaway Switchboard: (800) RUNAWAY
  • Homeless Crisis Hotline: (800) 438-3890
  • Covenant House NineLine: (800) 999-9999
  • Maine Crisis Hotline: (207) 774-HELP
Running Away: You're Not Alone (2024)

FAQs

Running Away: You're Not Alone? ›

This sudden urge to escape or run away feeling can precede, accompany, or follow an episode of nervousness, anxiety, fear, and elevated stress, or occur 'out of the blue' and for no apparent reason. This sudden urge to escape or run away feeling can range in intensity from slight, to moderate, to severe.

Why do I feel the urge to escape? ›

This sudden urge to escape or run away feeling can precede, accompany, or follow an episode of nervousness, anxiety, fear, and elevated stress, or occur 'out of the blue' and for no apparent reason. This sudden urge to escape or run away feeling can range in intensity from slight, to moderate, to severe.

Why don't police look for runaways? ›

If your missing child ran away from home, the police may not look for them. Around the country, classification as a runaway often means officers put less effort into looking for a missing child. Under federal rules, runaways also are disqualified from Amber Alerts.

Is wanting to run away normal? ›

Fantasizing about running away, or getting close to actually doing so, is perhaps more common than you may think. At its core, running away is a means to escape our current world—a world that isn't serving us the way we desire. Maybe you feel stuck or bored and are craving a renewed sense of vigor.

Is it normal to want to run away and start over? ›

There are many situations in our lives that can lead to stress and desperation. And it is entirely normal to want to run away from everything and start a new life. But it doesn't mean that it is the best solution to your case. Try to talk to people, friends, family, or professionals about it.

What is excessive escapism? ›

The problem occurs when we escape a little too often for a little too long, or when escaping interferes with our daily life. This can be a sign that we are addicted to escapism. It's important to evaluate whether your escapism is a healthy form of self-care or a potentially dangerous habit.

What is self escapism? ›

Escapism is mental diversion from unpleasant aspects of daily life, typically through activities involving imagination or entertainment. Escapism also may be used to occupy one's self away from persistent feelings of depression or general sadness.

How long do most runaways last? ›

How Long They Stay: Duration. About one-fifth of runaways return within 24 hours, and, after one week, three-quarters of all runaways have returned home or to care.

How hard do cops look for runaways? ›

Around the country, classification as a runaway often means officers put less effort into looking for a missing child, according to a USA TODAY review of more than 50 police procedural manuals.

What do cops do when they find a runaway? ›

Detaining Runaways

Law enforcement officers may take action and detain a runaway when there is an imminent danger to their safety or in situations where they are suspected of committing a crime.

Is running away a coping mechanism? ›

One type of coping strategy is to run away from problems in order to avoid them altogether. However, this can lead to eventually having to deal with the consequences of running away or even making the situation worse.

What are the signs of running away? ›

Behaviours to be aware of:

Signs of self-harming behaviour such as cutting, substance use, and high risk sexual behaviours. An increase in reckless behaviour and/or rule breaking (e.g., coming home late or not at all, using alcohol/drugs, fighting, lying, stealing)

Why do avoidants run away? ›

Avoidants are afraid of and incapable of tolerating true intimacy. Since they were brought up not to depend on anyone or reveal feelings that might not be acceptable to caregivers, their first instinct when someone gets really close is to run away.

How to leave your life behind and start new? ›

How do I start over in life?
  1. Start with reflection.
  2. Examine your value system.
  3. Revisit (and rewrite) your goals.
  4. Work up the courage to change.
  5. Make your next move.
  6. Get a coach.
  7. Keep checking in on yourself.

What should I do if I run away? ›

Staying safe after you've run away
  1. Keep in contact with people. Tell a friend or relative you trust where you're going and what's happening. ...
  2. Be careful about offers to help. If you need help or advice, talk to Childline or the Runaway Helpline. ...
  3. If you're unsafe, call the police.

Can you run away as an adult? ›

The short answer is no. Running away is not a crime. You cannot get arrested or charged with a crime for running away from your family. However – and this is a big however – some states consider running away a status offense.

What is the desire to escape called? ›

Definitions of escapism. an inclination to retreat from unpleasant realities through diversion or fantasy. synonyms: escape.

What is it called when you want to escape reality? ›

Escaping from reality is termed as escapism. An escapist is the one who doesn't live in real world, but dreams,wishes and fantasizes instead. Escapism is the tendency to seek distraction and relief from unpleasant realities to the safety and comfort of a fantasy world.

Is escapism anxiety? ›

Escapism is the opposite of mindfulness - that is living in the moment, of living mindfully. It may be that for you, facing reality is simply too terrifying. This is at the root of your anxiety, the fear of “doing the living”, becoming frightened of your own existence.

How do I stop wanting to escape? ›

How to Wean Yourself Off of Escapism
  1. Enforce the “Real Life-Right Now” Rule. The more fun you make real life seem, the less you may feel the need to escape it. ...
  2. Redefine What It Means to Escape. ...
  3. Identify What You're Trying to Avoid (and Why) ...
  4. Aim for Smaller Doses of Escapism. ...
  5. “Escape” to the World You're Already In.
Aug 10, 2015

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