By Janis Meredith | Posted 1/14/2019
If your child is naturally aggressive about everything they do, including sports, then you may not need to read any further.
But for those of you parenting kids who insist on playing a sport, even though they don't possess an ounce of aggression, keep reading!
Here are the best ways for you to handle this so that it benefits your child and doesn’t hurt your relationship with them:
Focus on Fun. If your child is young, and especially if he or she is just starting out in sports, then teaching them to be aggressive should not be your focus. Pushing your child to be competitive, or aggressive, usually doesn’t work anyway and may cause your child to display resentment. Just let them be a kid and have fun while learning the fundamentals.
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Find a better fit. Your child may not like the physical contact of a sport like a football, soccer or basketball. Some kids enjoy individual sports more than team sports. Give tennis, track, and field, swimming, or golf a try.
Build your child’s skills. At a young age, kids who are more aggressive tend to be the ones who have more aggressive personalities overall. They are not aggressive in playing because they are better skill wise; they are aggressive because that’s just who they are. Kids who are not so aggressive should focus on growing their skills as they grow older. As a young athlete becomes more confident in their skills, they will be more courageous in their play; once they start perfecting the skills, the competitiveness will come naturally.
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Be a positive sports parent. The bottom line in youth sports is this: as a parent you have the power to make or break your child’s experience. If you encourage without pushing and support without stifling, your child will grow into their own.
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Whether that means they play aggressively in a physical sport, or whether they don’t play sports at all, they will discover their own abilities and passions.
Many top athletes were shy as youngsters. Tennis legend Pete Sampras had a reputation for being quite reserved, perhaps even shy, but he still developed into a world-class tennis player. Dedication, determination, and commitment, not aggression, made him the player he was, and those traits will make your child a good athlete as well.
Janis B. Meredith is a family and parenting coach. She provides resources to help parents raise champions. Learn more about how she can help parents Raise Champions.
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This article addresses the challenges parents face when their children are not naturally inclined towards aggression in sports. It provides guidance on how to support kids who might not possess aggressive traits, emphasizing the importance of nurturing their skills, finding suitable sports, and fostering a positive environment.
Let's break down the concepts discussed:
1. Non-Aggressive Nature in Sports:
The article focuses on children who aren't naturally inclined towards aggression in sports, emphasizing that not all kids possess this trait. It acknowledges that pushing a non-aggressive child towards aggression can be counterproductive and may lead to resentment.
2. Focus on Fun and Fundamentals:
For young athletes, the emphasis is placed on fun and learning the fundamentals rather than aggressive play. This approach aims to allow kids to enjoy the sport and gradually develop their skills without the pressure of competitiveness.
3. Finding a Suitable Sport:
Suggests exploring individual sports like tennis, track and field, swimming, or golf, as alternatives to team sports that might involve less physical contact. It encourages finding a better fit based on the child's preferences and comfort level.
4. Skill Development Over Aggression:
The article suggests that children who lack aggression should focus on developing their skills as they grow older. It notes that confidence in one's skills can lead to a more courageous style of play, eventually fostering competitiveness naturally.
5. Role of Positive Parenting:
Emphasizes the critical role of parents in shaping their child's sports experience. Encouragement and support are highlighted as essential elements without pushing or stifling the child's interests. This approach aims to allow kids to discover their abilities and passions at their own pace.
6. Example of Successful Athletes:
The article references successful athletes like Pete Sampras, highlighting that not all top athletes exhibited aggressive tendencies as youngsters. It emphasizes dedication, determination, and commitment as key traits for success rather than inherent aggression.
7. Parental Guidance and Coaching:
Janis B. Meredith, a family and parenting coach, advocates for resources and guidance to help parents in fostering a conducive environment for their children in sports.
By understanding these concepts, parents can adapt their approach to support their non-aggressive children in sports while ensuring a positive and fulfilling experience.
