The Truth Behind Pathological and Compulsive Liars (2024)

You have to be honest that sometimes you tell little white lies. The person you consider your best friend wants to know what you think of her new hairstyle. Even though it's terrible, you tell her it looks great. When a worried partner asks if those extra 10 pounds are visible, you always say "No."

At least a little bit of lying is always going to happen. Lies are what make it possible for people to get along with each other. Still, if you don't stop lying, it can mess up your personal and professional life and be a threat to both.

Most people sometimes lie to protect themselves or those around them. But lying can be a big problem in relationships, especially if it happens often or for no clear reason.

It's annoying when someone lies most of the time, and once trust is lost, it's hard to get it back. The next step in your relationships might depend on how much you know about the different kinds of lying and why people lie.

This article tells you everything you need to know about pathological and compulsive lying.

Compulsive vs. Pathological Lying

People who lie all the time are compulsive liars. A lot of times, people lie for no good reason. They are likelier to lie in the same spot, which may look like a habit or reflex. People who always tell lies are likelier to tell white lies or lies they think other people want to hear and lie to get out of uncomfortable situations.

When confronted with their lies, people who lie all the time are more likely to admit that they lied. Many things are happening, but most experts agree that they start lying when they are young. They might have had a bad childhood or grew up where everyone was expected to lie.

People who lie all the time are easy to spot because they have telltale signs of lying, like avoiding eye contact, sweating a lot, and stumbling or rambling when they talk.

On the other hand, pathological liars have mastered the art of lying with full confidence, and they often lie to deal with stress (e.g., they fix their gaze upon you rather than looking away).

Those people have a pathological need to lie and often use tricks to get what they want. They don't care who they hurt as long as they get what they want. Most of the time, these lies are very dramatic, complicated, and specific.

A pathological liar has a skewed view of the world, while a compulsive liar usually knows the difference between right and wrong. When questioned, they get angry and refuse to admit that they have been lying.

What Exactly is Pathological or Compulsive Lying?

Almost everyone lies from time to time. People can lie for many different reasons, including −

• Avoiding hurting the feelings of people they care about.

• Protecting themselves from what they think is dangerous.

• Feel guilty or ashamed.

• Staying away from things that could cause trouble or conflict

• Taking a quick, hasty step.

• Making themselves look better.

• To avoid getting in trouble.

• Making up reasons not to do something.

A pathological or compulsive liar will lie often and habitually, even without reason.

Anything they say could be a lie, even if it initially seems small. If they lie about what happened, they might feel better and safer. When people lie in these ways, they endanger themselves and those close to them and mess up the lives of those who care about them.

There isn't a big difference between "pathological lying" and "compulsive lying" from a clinical point of view, so the terms are often used interchangeably. The study found that pathological lying, including compulsive lying, is a better way to describe the condition.

Can Compulsive or Pathological Liars Change?

Most compulsive or pathological liars don't have the drive to make the changes they need to make to go to therapy. They only do this when a court tells them to after breaking the law. They may tell the truth after bad things happen due to lying, like losing all their money, getting divorced, or falling behind at work.

Few studies have looked into possible treatments for lying. With the help of counseling or psychotherapy, people can learn to be less impulsive.

Advice on how to Deal with a liar in a Conversation

To not participate in

Tell them you caught them lying, but don't argue with them. When you always argue with someone who lies, they are likely to start with another lie. This could make the situation worse. If you try to make them pay for their lie, you can expect a denial and maybe even anger.

Keep Your Cool

Keeping your temper in check is important, no matter how hard things are. In other words, you can leave if you want to. If they keep hurting you with lies, you should consider breaking up with them. Make safe spaces for yourself to keep your mind healthy.

Get Help from a Professional

A mental health specialist may be needed to help with long-term problems and any underlying mental illness. You might also get help from services like psychotherapy or an intervention focusing on your family.

Be Supportive

Tell them that their attempts to be arrogant don't work on you. They need to know that you like them for who they are and want them to stay that way. Do the right thing by not lying and admitting when you're wrong. This is very important to remember if you are someone kids or others look up to. This makes it seem like it's normal to be flawed.

Conclusion

Talking to a professional might be helpful if you or someone you know has a problem with lying, whether occasional or chronic.

If a mental health illness exacerbates lying, treatment for that disease will also improve other aspects of the person's life. These diseases negatively impact one's health. Hence early detection and treatment are crucial.