What It Means When a Guy Texts You Everyday: Is He a Player? (2024)

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Co-authored byKate Dreyfusand Eric McClure

Last Updated: September 26, 2023Fact Checked

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   Most players won’t text you every day. Players typically don’t invest a ton of time into chasing someone—they’ve got too many girls to go after. Also, a player will usually have enough confidence to ask you out relatively quickly. As a result, the odds are pretty low he’s a player if he’s texting you every day for weeks on end.^[1]

   • Still, if a player doesn’t have many prospects right now, he may have the time and patience to take it slow by texting you every day. It’s unlikely, but it could happen.
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   It’s actually more likely he’s not a player if he’s super responsive. If he texts you every single day, it means he’s really invested in you. That points more towards “good long-term partner” than player. There are plenty of reasons a guy might text you daily that have nothing to do with being a player.^[2] For example:

   • He could just be shy. A shy guy may find texting their crush to be easier than conversation on the phone, since he can think through their responses.
   • He might be a little lonely. A guy who doesn’t have a huge social circle will have plenty of time to dedicate to your text conversations.
   • He’s not worried about playing it “cool.” Players often play coy when they like someone, but if a guy is dedicating tons of time talking to you, he’s not worried about the way it comes off.
   • He really really likes you. Look, when you’re head over heels, you’re likely to do everything you can to stay in contact with someone. This may be Mr. Right if you feel the same way.
See Also
How Many Days Should I Wait to Text Him? Here's What Dating Experts SayPour One Out For The Three-Day Wait-to-Text Rule, 'Cuz It's DeadExploring Male Psychology: 9 Stages & 22 Things that Go in Guy’s mind during the ‘No Contact Rule’ - HeTextedIs The Three Day Rule Still A Thing With Online Dating?

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   He only texts you late at night or when he wants to “chill.” If you feel like a booty call, that feeling means something. Players are often mainly interested in the physical part of a relationship, so if you tend to get a lot of texts from him after 10PM or he only reaches out to hang out alone together at his home, he’s probably a player.^[3]

   • The “wyd” and “hmu if you want to hang” texts are classic player moves.
   • A drunk text—especially out of nowhere—is another sign he may not want something serious.
   • Don't expect an exclusive relationship from a player.
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   Your conversations feel kind of superficial. A player won’t care about what your childhood was like, or what your dreams and aspirations are. If your convos trend more towards surface-level chitchat, it’s a potential sign that he isn’t really invested in you as a person.^[4]

   • If there’s a ton of “haha” and “lol” in his responses, you may not be texting a guy who genuinely likes you.
   • A guy who genuinely likes you will do everything he can to get to know you super well.
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   You can’t tell if he actually likes you or not. Players are usually master manipulators, and they try to draw girls in by playing mind games or being evasive. If a guy actually likes likes you and he wants a genuine relationship, you won’t have to read between the lines. He’ll flirt, compliment you, and be super responsive.^[5]

   • Your gut feeling means a lot here. If you feel like something is “off,” you may be talking to a player.
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   He’s super forward when he flirts. A guy who really cares about you would never risk insulting you over text by being too aggressive with their advances. They’ll flirt, but it will be a softer, friendlier, and “safer” kind of flirting. A player, on the other hand, is very likely to shoot their shot quickly without putting much thought into it.^[6]

   • For example, “You’re so sweet!” and, “I love the way you always know what to say 🥰” are so friendly and supportive that the guy clearly wants you to feel good and cares.
   • On the other hand, things like, “D*mn you’re hot,” and, “I want to do X to you,” are so forward that it’s obvious they aren’t taking your feelings into account.
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   He’s much more responsive in person. A player is going to be much more motivated to be receptive and active when you two are hanging out, since it’s an opportunity for him to woo you and get something out of it. If he feels like a totally different person when you two hang IRL, you may be right to be suspicious of his intentions.^[7]

   • You can tell a guy may be a player if he never wants to hang out in groups, too. A guy with genuine interest will totally hang out with you while his friends are around.

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1. It means you two probably have a close relationship. A guy may or may not have a crush on you if he texts you every day, but he definitely cares about you! Nobody texts someone that much if they don’t care about them. He may want to be friends, or he may want a romantic relationship.^[8]

   • If his texts are especially flirty, he regularly texts you first, or he texts you first thing in the morning, he probably likes you.
   • If his texts are super straightforward, he doesn’t flirt, or he doesn’t text you back quickly, he likely just wants to be friends.

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1. Yes, guys with a crush will tend to text you a ton. If a guy is interested in being with you, they’ll definitely be responsive and present when it comes to staying in contact via text. It’s not an automatic given that he likes you if he’s texting a lot, but it’s definitely a big possibility. You can tell he likes you if he:^[9]

   • Messages you throughout the day. A guy who likes you will text a lot—even when they’re busy.
   • Uses a lot of playful emojis. Emojis like 😉, 😏, and 😇 are all slightly suggestive and flirty. A guy won’t use these a lot if he doesn’t like you.
   • Compliments you a lot. A guy who just wants to be friends wouldn’t put a ton of effort into saying they like your hair, personality, style, etc.
   • Uses pet names or nicknames. If a guy calls you “cutie,” “sweetheart,” or “babe,” they’re 100% into you.

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   You might be happy dating a player, if you’re okay with a quick fling. Players aren’t monsters, they just know what they want and they want something very specific—physical intimacy in the short term. If you’re into that, go for it! There’s nothing wrong with a shorter relationship that’s a little more focused on the hooking up side of things.^[10]

   • Don’t feel bad about dating a player. There are no “right” or “wrong” partners—there are just right and wrong partners for you depending on your needs.
   • Just make sure you set some checks and balances for yourself before you start dating a player, so you can be sure that they're honoring your boundaries.
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   If you genuinely like the guy and you don’t get over invested, you’ll be happy. If you’re the kind of person who tends to fall hard for people, it may be tough to date a player. But if you’re pretty good about understanding boundaries and you can compartmentalize your feelings, go for it! Nobody said relationships need to last forever, and if you like this guy, you shouldn’t worry about him being Mr. Forever.^[11]

   • It’s okay for relationships to end. So long as you’re happy spending time with someone when the odds are good you won’t last a super long time, it’s totally fine.
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   You may want to avoid dating a player if you want a long-term thing. If you really aren’t interested in a quick fling and you really value emotional intimacy and availability, dating a player may not be the right move for you. And that’s perfectly fine! You should never change what you want when looking for love, and there’s nothing wrong with giving a player a pass.^[12]

   • You can always give a player a shot and just see what happens when you start dating. If he turns out to be everything you thought he’d be, move on! Maybe he’ll surprise you, though.

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